Identifying What Others Value and Knowing What’s Needed to Establish Trust with Them

In my previous post, I shared the two components of Emotional Intelligence and discussed, in more detail, how to BECOME MORE SELF-AWARE so that you can more EFFECTIVELY MANAGE YOURSELF.
Now, let's turn our attention to the 2nd component: Situational-Awareness.
To better manage your relationships and the various situations in which you find yourself, it is incredibly important that you know how to identify...
  • the EXPECTATIONS and fears of others – and – 
  • the best approach for building trust with them.
Why? Because an awareness and understanding of this critical information will better inform your decision making as to how you choose to communicate and interact with them.

So how can you do this?

Well, it starts with being able to identify what others value as well as what they fear, and then knowing what's needed to establish trust. Here's how to do that:
1.

When interacting with others, pay close attention to:

  • body language such as posture, use of hands, and, facial expressions
  • tone and expression of their voice such as pace, pitch, volume, inflection, etc.
  • overall energy of their physical and emotional presence
  • the words they choose to communicate with others
  • how they behave and respond when interacting with others
2.

Then, based on your observations, answer the following two questions:

Does this person tend to be more...

Fast-Paced & Outspoken

– OR –

Cautious & Reflective

Does this person tend to be more...

Challenging & Skeptical

– OR –

Accepting & Warm

3.

Once you have your answers, download and use this guide to identify the expectations and fears of others as well as what they expect of others in order to feel like they can trust them.

After downloading this guide, here's how to use it.
If the individual with whom you're interacting is more Fast-Paced & Outspoken as well as more Challenging & Skeptical, it is likely their preferred communication and interaction style is a DOMINANT STYLE
In the corner of the D-quadrant, you will find this style's expectations and fears as well as what these individuals look for in others when establishing trust.
DOMINANT STYLE
If the individual is more Fast-Paced & Outspoken but rather than challenging and skeptical they are more ACCEPTING & WARM, it is likely their preferred communication and interaction style is the INFLUENCING STYLE.
In the corner of the i-quadrant, you will find this style's expectations and fears as well as what these individuals look for in others when establishing trust.
INFLUENCING STYLE
However, if the individual with whom you're interacting is more cAUTIOUS & REFLECTIVE and more ACCEPTING & WARM, it is likely their preferred communication and interaction style is the STEADINESS STYLE.
In the corner of the S-quadrant, you will find this style's expectations and fears as well as what these individuals look for in others when establishing trust.
STEADINESS STYLE
And finally, if the individual is more cAUTIOUS & REFLECTIVE as well as more CHALLENGING & SKEPTICAL, it is likely their preferred communication and interaction style is a CONSCIENTIOUS STYLE.
You will find this style's expectations and fears in the corner of the C-quadrant as well was what individuals with this primary style look for when establishing trust with others.
CONSCIENTIOUS STYLE

As mentioned earlier, there's way more to it than this when seeking to understand why others think and behave in the ways that they think and behave. 

However, this is where it all starts.

Get after it! Your world is a laboratory just waiting to be keenly observed!

"My coaching with Starla helped me to step back and look at difficult situations in a different light.  Now, when confronted with a challenging situation, I immediately assess the behavioral profile of the person I'm working with to better respond in a way that gets the end result I am looking for. I've already resolved several difficult negotiations by evaluating the situation first before immediately responding."

Jason

Everything DiSC® Workplace Profile
One of the tools I use to help my clients connect better, build stronger relationships, and improve the quality of their interactions is the Everything DiSC® Workplace Profile. This personalized profile…
  • Explores the priorities, motivators, and stressors that drive your workplace behavioral style.
  • Helps you understand and appreciate the strengths of your style along with how it impacts others.
  • Helps you understand and appreciate the behavioral style of others and shows you how to make the necessary adjustments to communicate more effectively with them.
You can use this tool to enhance your SELF-AWARENESS. The better you know and understand yourself, the more in control you will be of your thoughts, behaviors, and interactions with others. 

It can also be used to enhance your SITUATIONAL-AWARENESS. The better you know and understand others, the more in control you will be of your relationships.
Starla West International, LLC is an independent Everything DiSC® Authorized Partner
“Everything DiSC” is a registered trademark of John Wiley & Sons, Inc. or its affiliated companies

November 20, 2019
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